In the premiere “Come Talk To Me” blog post, “Take It Like A Man,” we began exploring “pegging,” a fetish in which a heterosexual man enjoys being sodomized by a woman wearing a strap-on dildo. I want to thank Strappy (Twitter @Strappon_Lover) for being courageous enough to be my first blog guest and for discussing a subject so very taboo. If you haven’t read that post, I suggest you read it as soon as you’re done with this one because in part two, “Take It Like A Bitch,” we meet a couple that has a completely different pegging experience from Strappy. Where he pegs for pleasure, Linda and Shawn peg for pain. I was fascinated by the stark difference in experiences and tried desparately to chat with them via podcast but alas, they were more comfortable being interviewed on (digital) paper.
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Casey: In what city do you live?
Linda/Shawn: Meridian, MS
Casey: Do you have a steady partner and are they into pegging?
Linda: Yes, in our relationship we are a kinky couple and we use pegging as a form of domestic discipline just like spanking whipping and paddling.
Shawn: Yes, she is the dominant and I am the submissive. She likes to administer the pegging.
Casey: Are you and Shawn married? How long have you been in a relationship?
Linda: We might as well be, we have been seeing each other off and on for almost 12 years
Casey: How long have you been pegging?
Linda/Shawn: About 8-9 months
Casey: There is so much taboo surrounding pegging, what made you decide it was something you wanted to try?
Linda: We watch a lot of pegging porn and we both agreed that it might be something that will enhance our sex life.
Shawn: Me and my mistress agreed that pegging might enhance our sex life.
Casey: Who decides when it’s time to peg?
Linda: I do, usually it’s according to time and mood.
Casey: How does it feel to peg? What do you enjoy about it?
Linda: We use pegging as a form of domestic discipline. I really enjoy punishing him like this.
Casey: How does it feel to be pegged? What do you enjoy about it?
Shawn: Being pegged is painful and you have to learn a pain tolerance, it’s part of being a submissive. We use it as a form of domestic discipline. I guess in a relationship being a submissive, there’s some pleasure within the pain.
Casey: You said you use pegging as “domestic discipline.” What does that mean?
Linda: It keeps him in line and makes him behave. He knows not to flirt with the young girls when I am around.
Casey: Since pegging is used as “domestic discipline,” do you spank and/or use a paddle during the pegging?
Linda: Usually before, since pegging is the most effective, there are lesser punishments that lead up to the pegging.
Casey: Describe your favorite pegging toy.
Linda/Shawn: We use a slightly oversized strap-on dong that measures about 12-13 inches long and about 7-8 inches round.
Casey: Describe your worst pegging experience.
Linda: When he won’t be still and tries to wiggle away from me.
Shawn: My worst experience is when mistress unexpectedly went up in me too rough, it was extremely painful, I screamed and cried throughout the entire session.
Casey: What do you do when he tries to get away?
Linda: Oh that would be too bad for him because he knows he would get it double.
Casey: What was your first pegging experience like?
Shawn: Since this was new to both of us, we had to find the right size dildo. The first one we picked was too large. “No way!” I said. The next one was a little smaller and more realistic. So I “grin and bear it” and took my pegging. It was absolutely mind-blowing!
Casey: You use a pretty big dildo that could potentially cause some damage. Do you have a cover story in case you have to call 911? If, yes, what is it?
Linda: Lol! We talked about that when we saw blood, Hopefully It [won’t] go that far, if it does, we’ll just have to see the look on the paramedics faces because they’ll know we have had too much fun! Lol!
Casey: You said pegging can be painful. Have you ever been seriously injured? How do you feel after a severe pegging?
Shawn: Yes, taking a pegging is very painful, I really had no idea how painful it would be or I would have thought twice before getting into it, lol. I can recall one session when she drew blood, it really scared me, “How would I explain this to the doctor?” I asked mistress, Luckily, it cleared up. I was pretty sore for a while, especially when I poop, lol! Mistress would say, “Being sore will teach you how to behave.” All I can say is “yes Mistress, thank you for punishing me, I’ll try to behave myself next time.”
Casey: Do you use a “safe word”?
Casey: Are you dominant just when pegging or during all your sexual encounters?
Linda: Most encounters include spanking, whipping, paddling, pegging, servicing my feet, and yes, we still do make love!
Casey: Have you always been into inflicting pain during sex? Would you consider yourself a masochist?
Linda: Not always but most of the time. And no I don’t think of myself as a masochist.
Casey: Are you submissive in all your sexual experiences? How would you describe the roll of a sub?
Shawn: Mostly submissive, I think my role as a submissive is to behave myself, be good to my mistress, and become the perfect gentleman she wants me to be.
Casey: Have you ever considered bringing in a third party, in other words, would you consider inviting another woman or man to your pegging sessions?
Linda: No threesomes! Absolutely not! We are strictly a one-on-one couple!
Casey: Have you ever been to a sex club or swingers event?
Casey: Are you a part of a group that enjoys pegging? Do you share your experiences with other people?
Shawn: No, we keep our experiences only with our closest friends and we do some sharing online.
Casey: Pegging is a very taboo fetish. Is it the first fetish you’ve explored and are there any other fetishes you would like to experience?
Shawn: No, foot fetish is one of my first fetishes, I have had a foot fetish since I was a teenager. Being spanked, whipped, and paddled by a dominatrix came later, I recently just got into pegging and so far my sex life has been very fulfilling.
Casey: What else can you tell me about your experience pegging?
Shawn: Definitely a learning experience, to give in and let mistress take control. Just like submitting to your mother or your teacher. Sometimes the pain of being spanked, whipped, and paddled feels [like] a bolt of lightning throughout my whole body. To be pegged feels even more intense, it’s like being spanked, whipped and paddled inside. Mistress always says (about domestic discipline), “Punishment is most effective when the whelps and bruises are inside of you.” But I can also feel an ounce of pleasure within a ton of pain.
Casey: The title of the article is “Take It Like A Man” but you said some women/mistresses would say “Take It Like A Bitch.” What’s it like being referred to that way? Does it effect your ego?
Shawn: Some dominatrix(s) like to humiliate their submissives, like she is the man of the house and he is the woman. I have seen some even dress in women’s clothing. That is not the case with me. In my case, I usually scream and cry during a session. I can’t help it, it really hurts! When she sees me crying she feels powerful and in control, just like a man would feel when he dominates a woman.
Casey: If you’re a woman interested in pegging, what are some tips for bringing up to your man?
Linda: We watch a lot of pegging porn pics and videos. I asked if this is something he would be interested in, something new to improve our sex life.
Casey: If you’re a man interested in getting pegged, what are some tips for bringing up to your girl?
Shawn: We watch a lot of pegging porn and we get ideas from the pornstars. I would ask if pegging is something she would be interested in, ask questions and get feedback, explore a little, you may find some amazing discoveries!
Casey: There was an article written by the editors of Netscape that listed a group of colors to describe a person’s level of sexual desire. Based on that article, I coined the phrase Sexual Rainbow (TM). What color(s) would best describe you? What color are you on the Sexual Rainbow?
Linda: Oh the woman in black of course, I even put on my little black dress to go shopping on Black Friday! Lol!
Shawn: Oh, I am definitely in the black!
After our initial interview, Shawn wanted to share a few more thoughts. We had a quick exchange via Twitter Direct Message.
Shawn: Maybe next time we can talk about taking it up to [the] point of passing out.
Casey: Tell me about it now. Please.
Shawn: Okay, it starts out when she goes in so hard and deep, I can feel it in my stomach, I can best describe it as a huge rock stuck inside of me and it feels like I’m pooping backwards. My stomach cramps and I am screaming at this point. It is a natural reaction to poop but as hard as I try to I can only feel mistress go in even deeper. As I strain to poop, I start to feel dizzy and everything goes blurry. I have [come] within inches of passing out but I haven’t yet. We have talked about letting the lights go out just once. To go on an even greater mistress adventure, we always talk about going above and beyond what we already have accomplished. We will probably try that in our next session.
Casey: I’m all for letting the lights go out. Let me know what it’s like.
Shawn: Sure! You’ll be the first to know.
Casey: Fun. Thanks. But I think mistress will be first to know about you passing out. Lol. And when it does happen I want to know how she feels knowing she made you pass out.
Shawn: Of course she will be first to know, [I’m] talking besides us. That leads me to another subject, accidents that happen during pegging. I’m kinda embarrassed to talk about it but it does happen, lol!
Casey: Please don’t be embarrassed. I’m trying to educate and open people’s minds. If there is something folks should know don’t hesitate to share. Right now there is very little by way of first hand experience out there. I’m learning just as much as all the followers.
Shawn: Yeah I’m glad you’re doing that. Mistress calls it “striking oil.” But I don’t think anyone wants to talk about poop, I know it happens but its not supposed to happen during sex.
Casey: I beg to differ. When a woman is delivering a baby, pooping is a huge possibility but no one talks about it because its “gross.” I don’t think you should hide the truth. Poop can happen with anal sex no matter what. People should know that so it doesn’t freak them out.
Shawn: True, I guess its one of the “taboo” subjects, you know it happens but you don’t want to talk about it.
While the term pegging may be new, its not new as a sexual act. I’m convinced men have been getting pegged as far back as Sodom and Gomorrah if not futher. What has fascinated my since releasing the interviews are the multitude of opinions surrounding the taboo. Many find it hard to believe a straight man could enjoy being pegged and not be gay or bisexual. I must admit I don’t have an opinion one way or the other but I have enjoyed debating the issue. In one conversation, I asked, “If a man enjoys being pegged makes him gay, does a woman wearing a strap-on and going deep on another woman make her a lesbian?” The response was “maybe.” And I would have to agree. Why would I agree, you may ask. Its simple. Its a matter of opinions. While I may not call you a super dike, someone else may think you’re one step away from going from Chastity Bono to Chaz Bono.
I’m fascinated by fetishes and I have a few (okay maybe several) of my own. Hopefully we can explore together and eliminate the taboos and barriers to what can be one of the best moments we can experience. Please feel free to contact me with topics you’re curious about or would love to discuss via blog or podcast.
(Since the release of the premiere “Come Talk To Me” blog post, I’ve received a varied mix of questions and comments. I want to encourage readers to either Direct Message me on Twitter at @readcaseycarter or leave a comment or message via the site or send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. All of my guests are more than eager to share their experiences and would love to get your feedback.)